Monday, August 01, 2005
I love my wife
[the fact that it has taken me a few days to rewrite this lost post shows both my rededication to studying my Hebrew and to my hatred of rewriting anything...]
So, for a second time, here goes:
I love being married... I love my wife. Now, it is possible that this post is being affected by the fact that [when I originally wrote this] my wife has been away for the past five days. It is more than likely that missing my lovely wife has intensified my feelings towards her... what do they say? "absence makes the heart grow fonder". True, but that doesn't explain away the fact that I truly and honestly love being married, and I love my wife - wholeheartedly.
Now, I should also say that when I say I love my wife, that doesn't mean that I don't ever act selfishly and treat her poorly. It surely doesn't mean that we don't ever raise our voices and disagree quite spiritedly (just ask anyone of our neighbours or friends over the past 5 years!) When I say that I love my wife it doesn't even mean that there haven't been times during our marriage that I haven't questioned things... but it does mean, that every one of these times I have come back to the very real fact that I am STILL in love with my wife. It's not JUST that without her I'd be far less of a man, much less successful (of course, if you look at my life now, you might wonder how much less successful I could be... ) and WAY less mature. I definitely love her for making me better. But it's more than that. I LOVE MY WIFE!!! I love HER.
Not only do I love her, I also love being married. Now, I personally believe that marriage is a bit maligned in our culture. No, I'm not talking about the issue of same-gender marriages or the divorce rate or anything like that. What I'm talking about is the general feeling amongst men that when they finally tie on the old ball and chain, or settle down, life is significantly more dull, less exciting and less their own. Now this last bit may be true (life being less their own), but the talk of men, the jokes about their old maid, and what not, gives the impression that this is true... when I wholeheartedly believe it is not. And when you get down to it and ask men, quietly maybe, to say whether they are better of or worse off, I believe that a great majority would say they're better off.
It's funny, because as I type this [originally mind you... how funny if it would happen again, right now!] I'm looking out my window to see my neighbours (Chris & Miriam), kissing over the railing. Nothing obscene, just one cute kiss from two people who are in love.
Before I dive into the grand finally, I must interject with one further comment. The DUMBEST, and I mean absolutely stupidest, most assinine comment I HAVE EVER HEARD about marriage is one made by Donald Trump some years ago, when his marriage to Marla Maples was ending (or had just ended, I can't remember). And I don't say this to malign the Donald, I don't want this blog to be about bagging on anyone or anything. But he said, when asked something about the turning point, or when he knew it was over or something that, 'it had become too much work. Marriage shouldn't be hard/work (something like that)'. Now, is this the same guy that worked his butt off to create one of the largest real estate empires in the world? Is this the same guy who when he was worth less than nothing, when his empire had tanked, rolled up his sleaves and worked harder to get back on top? How could he say something like this? Marriage is worth something ONLY when there's work involved! You NEVER appreciate the things that come easy. You never take care of a rental car the same way you do the one you paid your hard earned money for. Life doesn't work that way. And you'll never appreciate a marriage more than if you have to overcome some obstacles together, compromise together, tough it out for a little while and realize the real muster of the one you committed your life to.
So, I want to put out a call to all those married men out there. I think it's time that we started to let the world know how much we love being married, how absolutely blessed we are by our spouses. I think it's high time we stopped pretending that we'd rather be out playing poker and boozing it up every night, instead of on the couch, watching a sappy movie with our wives curled up in our arms. I think its high time we stood up for a pretty sweet deal that we got - marriage! And whether anyone else joins in or not, I want the world to know that not only do I love being married, I love my wife! And I really love the fact that she's home now...